2/06/2013

Super Bowl Commercials?

Seriously?  I understand that out here on the Left Coast "our" team lost.  But the topic of conversation?  On Wednesday?  Is still?  The commercials? 

Not all the commercials.  Nobody out here in Bluest-of-Blue-States California has come in to the parts counter talking about the Dodge truck ("And so God made a farmer") commercial.  Everybody seems to want to talk about GoDaddy.  Which I guess is the point of advertising.  Days later guys are still wanting to act all Pre-teen about Eeew! Kissing! 

So much chatter that I had to watch it on YouTube.  The TV version was cute.  The "unrated" Internet version was a little too weird for me.  (Teh Frenchin, ur doin it wrong!)

So what's the big deal?  The sound?  Well yeah, the sound.  It doesn't sound like mouth smacking to me.  It sounds like somebody washing their hands.  With lots of soap.  But seriously, what's the big deal again?  A sound that accompanies video of kissing grosses you out? 

I have to confess ignorance about American television, since I haven't had TV for about 30 years, but don't they have, like, boobs and stuff on TV nowadays?  Didn't I read that they have full frontal female nudity except that it's not really real full nudity since the actress is wearing like a v-jay toupee or something?  And a commercial about kissing grosses you out? 

Why is this even a topic of conversation?  Internet registration and hosting services are in a category of interest only to a tiny fraction of the n-Million humans viewing the commercial.  I would have thought the commercial would have gone in one eye and out the other with nary a blip on the neuron meter.  What's the big deal? 

Is it Bob Parsons, GoDaddy founder?  He is a United States Marine Corps veteran.  A hunter.  Ergo, somebody Blue-Staters would love to hate.  Semper Fi, Bob, but I don't think you're the big deal here.

I think the big deal is Walter.

We live in a society that idolizes wealth, health, youth, and beauty.  Walter's got youth.  Maybe.  He's got a fat neck, frizzy hair, pallid skin, poor eyesight, a geek brain, and...

Walter's got the girl.

Without preliminary,  without having to be "the brain" part of a team in an adventure movie, without smooth talk, Walter gets the kiss. 

Walter's the problem.  Walter, with his un-beauty, is the problem.  Walter, with his body that is probably very similar to a lot more of the n-Millions watching him than will ever be interested in registering a domain name -- Walter is the problem.  Walter is the gross-out.  Walter is the (non) topic of conversation.  Let's talk about spit.  And slurp.  Whatever we do, let's not talk about Walter.




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