Me: [wakes up and smells nearby skunk]
Two A.M. Brain: There's a skunk. Right. Outside!
Me: [gets up and closes windows]
TAMB: That smells too rank to be outside.
TAMB: It's under the house! That's it! There's an angry rabid skunk under the house, emptying its glands right under my bedroom!
Me: Uh, shut up?
TAMB: It's spraying and spraying and we're going to smell this for weeks! You have to go down and kill it!
Me: Shut up!
TAMB: Kill it! Kill it! Kill it!
Me: Shut! The! Bleep! Up!
TAMB: [noise like a puppy that just got accidentally stepped on]
Me: [awake for another hour]